Monday night in prayer I was so captivated by the Holy Spirit...literally just longing for more and more of him.... I fell asleep praying in the spirit and when I woke on Tuesday..
HEARD: How badly do you want more?
Just from my experience with the Lord over the last 12 years...Whenever he presents this question to me... He is giving me an opportunity to prove my heart to him... My response was, "Terribly~ I want more!"
HEARD: You must tell of what I have done for you. How I have lead you here. How I am teaching you to dwell in my presence.
I have to admit... I am taken back by this.... as the last time I shared all of what the Holy Spirit was doing in my life...It wasn't so welcomed and I was persecuted greatly!! But, I am now in a place of better understanding of Christ.... So, I consented to tell my testimony... trusting that if the Holy Spirit is asking this task of me...he will not leave me!
I began to search the Spirit to see which part of my walk with him he would ask me to share.
HEARD: The most intimate part.
I knew exactly what he meant, not thrilled over it, but I understood it. I started to pray in the spirit and I felt the Holy Spirit saying, "Just listen....." I sat for hours and hours Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.... just listening to the Holy Spirit connecting parts of my life... of my walk with Jesus... He was showing me that through the years of my life... he was weaving a tapestry of love and trust with me... Even when I was the furthermost away from him he was still there... calling my spirit into obedience to God...working within my spirit the very call that he had created for me.... The very reason I exist... I was quickened to one of my favorite verses, "...And he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each of us. For in him we live and move and have our being. As some of your own poets have said, 'We are his offspring.'" ( Acts 17:26-28).
Even now as I am writing this I am seeing a quilt and on this quilt is written the word LOVE.... and he is telling me...that throughout all my years even the years I spent away from him he was still covering me with his love... and with his great hand he guided me out of harms way so many times.. into this time... where the Father will be glorified!
I tremble now as I remember all the times I was called upon by the Holy Spirit to pray...all of the faces he has shown me and I have heartedly obeyed. I am not sure if he did it to prove to me that I couldn't run from him ...or if he was determined to make me most miserable.... Either way the end result was me returning to him whole heartedly completely sold out wanting more and more of him each day.... And as I sit soaking in all he is telling me and showing...revealing the truths he has sown in me over the years...He is telling me that he could only take me so far without the full armor of God...He waited patiently for me to grasp the message of being Bold in the Spirit... only then was my armor complete ( Ephesians 6: 10-20)....I am suddenly see in a vision myself completely suited with the full Armor of God and beside me is an angel holding a sword above my head...the sword is going in all directions....(reminded me of the sword that was placed flashing back and forth guarding the tree of life~ Genesis 3: 24 )
I praise you Jesus...for your hand of loving kindness.... Thank you for never leaving me or never giving up on me...Thank you for being more stubborn than I was.... Thank you for guiding me here~~ May You alone be glorified~~
Isaiah 43
1 But now thus saith Jehovah that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel: Fear not, for I have redeemed thee; I have called thee by thy name, thou art mine.
2 When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned, neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.
3 For I am Jehovah thy God, the Holy One of Israel, thy Saviour; I have given Egypt as thy ransom, Ethiopia and Seba in thy stead.
4 Since thou hast been precious in my sight, and honorable, and I have loved thee; therefore will I give men in thy stead, and peoples instead of thy life.
5 Fear not; for I am with thee: I will bring thy seed from the east, and gather thee from the west;
6 I will say to the north, Give up; and to the south, Keep not back; bring my sons from far, and my daughters from the end of the earth;
7 every one that is called by my name, and whom I have created for my glory, whom I have formed, yea, whom I have made.
8 Bring forth the blind people that have eyes, and the deaf that have ears.
9 Let all the nations be gathered together, and let the peoples be assembled: who among them can declare this, and show us former things? let them bring their witnesses, that they may be justified; or let them hear, and say, It is truth.
10 Ye are my witnesses, saith Jehovah, and my servant whom I have chosen; that ye may know and believe me, and understand that I am he: before me there was no God formed, neither shall there be after me.
11 I, even I, am Jehovah; and besides me there is no saviour.
12 I have declared, and I have saved, and I have showed; and there was no strange god among you: therefore ye are my witnesses, saith Jehovah, and I am God.
13 Yea, since the day was I am he; and there is none that can deliver out of my hand: I will work, and who can hinder it?
